~May Your Light Shine =D~

Tuesday, May 5

went to church early yesterday to do some pw b4 cell. everyone was like "eh! u bring ur laptop to church! let me see!" lol. quite expected, esp since only one other guy i know brings laptop to church (not counting the leaders)
cell was really small.. though we have the biggest cell in z2, sunday, we also have the lowest attendance.=( only the regulars like me, pheobe, chloe, chris, josie and jer always turn up, though jeremy nvr turn up ytd.. then out of the 3 muskateers, only 2 turn up, but they only came for cell. nvr go for service, cos they got pw. gwen nvr come at all, also cos of pw. X/ i'm like "cant u schedule ur pw meeting at a later time?! its like if u have a competition u will make sure it wont clash right? so why cant u do the same for God?" i guess diff ppl, diff perspective.. but even so... haiz. havent seen gwen for a long time liao... at least pearlyn came. she havent come for super long ever since she was grounded. it was nice to have her back. =)

cell learned more about TAWG. sensitive area for me. considering i'm not doing it regularly.. like since forever.. haiz.

service was great. P. Janice preached. powerful msg. how to have a breakthrough life. sounds grammatically wrong but *shrugs*. identified with the msg.. but struggled to respond.. respond means i want something to be done, which means i need to do something, and i usually dun seem to do wat i know i should do.... haiz. so didnt want to respond even though i know i fit in tat category... but she just kept calling out to the ppl in the category.. like she was calling for me to respond. the need to respond was so great. so i responded. after tat, she moved on to the next category. it really felt like she was just waiting fr me to respond b4 she moved on...
i so need a breakthrough in some many areas.. in my life, studies, serving, ministry, personal tawg........ just have to surrender. make the effort to run back to Him. stop wasting time. stop running away. stop putting things off. just run back to the Father!

went out with janice for lunch. saded the usual gang disappeared. al and gerald nvr come. fab also.miranda n jon cant make it. asaph disappeared. glo going home... so ya. but had a good time of sharing with janice. went to zhi cha, but we both no money. so we share one plate of hor fun. let her eat 1st. but stare at her eat so weird. so talked a lot lor. lols. talked about sch, subject combi, random funny stuff... ya. n she ate like 2/3 of the whole plate!lol. but i wasnt hungry anyway. n sometimes she dun eat, so let her eat more is good for her. xP
then my turn to eat her turn to talk. 1st thing tat came out was relationship! >< lols. she's been like trying to guess who's the guys i like every since like 1 or 2 yrs liao!! haiz. but made her share about hers since i was eating. xP shared some about our past "relationship" life. not tat we had ever been in a relationship b4.. (she's 3yrs younger, and already have more crushes than me!! xP and her 1st crush was long way b4 mine! O_O) then she try to guess which guy i like.. haha. told her she guaranteed plus chop cannot guess one! lol. if she can guess i have to treat her a meal.. but lucky the deal was only for tat day until 3pm. cos after tat i gotta go. so she just kept guessing random guys lor. lols. guess everyone she knows tat i know. haha. gave her some minor clues to help her. but she still cannot guess.
spent the rest of the time in hans, while she continued to guess. lols. she even took my phone to check all the guys i have in my phone cos i told her i got the guys no inside. she was like quoting ever guy in my phone! haha. but still cannot guess. lol. then she ask a very crucial question tat if i answered yes (which was the ans to her qn) she sure can guess one, bcos the no of ppl in tat category is super limited, and the no of guys i'm close to inside tat is even less. was considering whethr to answer her or not. but cos it was 2.59... so oh well. told her the answer. then she immediately rattled off two names b4 i told her that its 3. so time's up. i cant let her guess liao. so now i'm not obligated to tell her whether she guessed correctly or not. but the 1st guy she said was one of them. xP but NO WAY am i going to say who it is man.have to protect myself and the guy. cant imagine wat wld happen if ppl know i like him.... my sis knows. but she's ok. we exchange secrets.. and i know she wont tell. but any other ppl besides her... sry. its not tat i dun trust u.. its just... if the guy ever finds out i'm so dead. and ppl wont imagine us togethr. its just not possible. its all just imagination on my part..

have to stop allowing ppl to guess who i like. glo tried for i dunno how long nvr got close. janice stuck home to close for comfort. seriously nvr imagined she wld think of tat qn! it nvr occured to any1 b4! but she promised not to tell any1 wat little she know. so tats gd. but still. i have to be more careful now.

had pw after tat. >< gpp... research... lessons learnt... >< went to pat's couz house to continue after our lappy's batt ran low. had dinner there. some burmese rice salad thing.. not really my kind of food.. finished at like 10pm? ya.went home super late. but at least its done. except for linus part-SOP..

today... nthing much eventful really happened.gp teacher nvr come. so did chem assignment, tried studying for reccurrence, too tired, slept the rest of the 1.5hr. stupid thing is did finish the chem assignment, forgot to put in his pigeon hole! >< stupid. haiz.

pe was fun. played handball. hahas. in the end the score was quite even. but since no one kept score so we not sure. but i think my grp won by a bit. was sort of quite even out lar. cos tat grp got yuxun(super tall) and they had one more player than us. but we got shao hua, n he super gd. so ya. the other team also got the japanese exchange student. she plays gd. but reminds me of certain ppl i cant stand playing games with in amkss.. shall not say more.

met mom at novena and ate ban mian for dinner. burn my tongue. >< had guitar lessons. she go buy another guitar. now i think i have at least 5 or 6 guitars at home liao.. plus an organ, plus piano, plus the soon gonna come the electric guit. lols. all we need is a drum set and bass and can set up our own mini band liao. i,bro,sis,mom play guit, bro going for e guit, sis going for piano, i sing, and i oh so wanna go for piano,bass, e guit, and drums lesson. in short, i wanna learn and play any and every instrument i can lay my hands on. xP
but guitar lesson was great. love the coach. great at teaching, plus many info to share. for once he ended early today. (before 10) but we ask one qn and he started sharing a lot of stuff... until like 10.20, 10.25 then we ended cos a boy needed to go home cos its like real late liao.. but the stuff he shared.. very worrying in some sense, thought-provoking. really change my mindset about tat country.all the stuff tat ppl dun usually see... and the msg is so urgent and important.. but not everyone wants to know and wants this msg to be shared... but now i'm curious and want to know more.. but no time to do my own research.. haiz. mayb next time.

jorene wont be going for the china trip liao. cos of the risk of the swine flu. =( should i still go? or not? still not confirmed whether tat dates got june event rehearsal or not.. but supposingly dun have for now.. think i'll still go lar. at least still got yuan lin.

then ava the results will be revealed on wed.. >< super worried and nervous. so wanna be in exco.. so wanna b VP.. haiz. and i still dunno wats my role in june event. hoping and praying tat broZC wld miraculously find another girl to take over the crucial role they need me to do so i can be released to do other stuff.. (esp behind the sound booth!). i'm not against working backstage or mic-ing the actresses.. but i only have a limited amt of time left to serve in IGNYTE. and there's only so many events in a yr. and for most events (any which have drama/actresses) i have to do mic-up. there' so little chances left for me to try other stuff. and this is a major mega huge event. and i so wanna do more besides just mic-ing up.

oops. super late liao. shldnt be blogging til so late. but too much stuff tat i need to share. 'else they'll occupy my mind and cause much-irritating distractions...

k.going off liao. adios.

~just me blogged at 5/05/2009 12:51:00 AM

May your light shine...
in the darkness...